"A good coach can change a game. A great coach can change a life."- John Wooden, famed UCLA basketball coach
I'm sure you've heard of life coaching, but may not be entirely sure about what it involves, or may have some misconceptions about what coaching can and cannot do for you. As a certified professional coach, I'd love to talk about what coaching is, and what it can do in your life.
Life coaching has exploded in the past few years, with references to it on TV, in the news and in social media. Though everyone's heard of it, not everyone fully understands what a life coach is, or why they might want to work with one.
As a life coach certified with one of the top coaching schools around, as well as someone who uses coaching services myself, I feel privileged to be able to help people through coaching.
Coaching has been around for a long time, but it wasn't always referred to as coaching. In present day, coaching has become more defined from other modalities like therapy, mentorship and advisors. I believe these distinctions are good, because they help us understand when we might want to seek out a coach, versus a therapist or other personal development or self-help specialist*.
To understand what coaching is, it helps to understand what it is not, and why.
Coaching is not:
1. Therapy. Generally speaking, therapy covers a lot of ground, and there's often a deep exploration of your past, perhaps even going back to childhood. Therapists have accreditation through years of training, and have professional requirements and standards.
Though many coaching programs have accreditation through organizations like the International Coach Federation (ICF), most coaching programs I know of aren't designed for years of training.
The reason for this is simple. Coaches don't focus on your past or dive deep into mental health issues. Though some aspects of those things may come up during sessions with a coach, most coaches don't spend a lot of time there. The focus is more on what's happening presently in your life.
There are many reasons why someone might choose coaching over therapy and vice versa. When there is deep trauma or long-standing issues stemming from traumatic events in the past, therapy is usually a more viable option than coaching. Also, if you've been formally diagnosed with a mental health disorder, a therapist or mental health professional is better suited to help.
Alternatively, if there is an issue you are working on currently, a coach can help you look at that issue from different angles, help you get unstuck, or help you formulate a plan for moving past it.
2. Advice. One key premise of many coaching programs is: Everyone has their own answers. As a coach, it's not my role to give you advice about what to do when you are facing an issue. I believe that you, as a unique, autonomous being, have everything within you to make the best decisions for your life using your own intuition and experience.
A coach will, however, probe and talk you through issues to help you identify intuitive thoughts and uncover those decisions for yourself. No one can provide you with a magic formula for reaching your goals or addressing issues in your life; a coach is no exception.
3. Mentorship. A mentor is often someone you can turn to for help with career growth or professional advice. A relationship with a mentor can be fairly informal and unstructured. Mentors also may not have any formal training around mentorship.
Credentialed coaches have been trained in many tools to help someone with life or career blocks. There are many different niches for coaching, so coaches can help you in many different aspects of your life, including personal, professional, social, etc.
Coaching is:
1. Specific. Usually, professionally trained coaches work with you on a specific issue at a time. Although other things may come up during a coaching session, most coaches will revisit the original issue to ensure you have gotten the help you wanted.
2. Structured. For my training, I was taught to follow a structured line of questioning to help get to the heart of the matter. Having a structure ensures that you are not simply "talking it out" with someone, but that you are working toward something, like recognition, resolution or action plan, with your coach. An individual coaching session similarly has a structure to ensure you are heard, and feel the session was helpful for you.
3. Strategic. A coach is there to help you get from one place to another, whether that's in your life, job, business, family, etc. Coaches help you identify the roadblocks that may be holding you back from reaching your goals, and use tools to help you address those obstacles. They can also work with you on creating a specific plan for how to achieve your dreams.
Why should I work with a coach?
Working with a coach can have many benefits in lots of aspects of your life. Coaching can help you resolve issues to help you reach your dreams and goals, help you better understand yourself and your patterns, and help you with your relationships, whether that's in your personal life, at work, with your family or your mate.
My work with coaches has enabled me to: let go of limiting beliefs about myself, get clear on what it is I really want for my life, find the courage and strength to pursue my dreams and let go of what's not serving me, understand how I tend to follow the same unfavorable patterns in romantic relationships and how to change that, how to get "unstuck" or out of spirals of negative thinking, and much, much more.
I was inspired to become a coach by working with one!
What happens in a coaching session?
Coaches can set up their sessions differently, but a typical coaching session is between 30 to 90 minutes. These take place one-on-one in person, over the phone or in a video session. During that time, a coach will clarify what help you are seeking and work with you toward resolution.
Most issues can't be resolved in just one session, so many coaches offer programs where you sign up for a set amount of sessions or a set amount of time (like six months) of coaching.
Many coaches also offer group coaching, where more than one person is coached on a specific topic, such as recovering from divorce, changing your eating habits, improving relationships, etc.
How much does coaching cost?
Costs vary widely. If you're working with an individual coach, that person sets their own pricing. If a coach is working under the umbrella of a coaching company, the company may specify charges for coaches. You can find coaches charging from ten dollars to tens of thousands of dollars an hour.
Does a coach need to have a certification/be formally trained?
Not every coach has gone through a formal coaching program. Some may have informal experience, or feel they are good listeners and can use their intuition to help others. There's no requirement that anyone who calls themselves a coach is formally trained.
It's ultimately up to you whether you want to work with a formally trained coach or not. If you vibe with someone and feel they can help you, it's your choice.
As someone who has worked with coaches with no or little formal training, I can tell you I received benefit from those coaches along with those who have training. The nice thing for me about training as (and working with) a certified coach is knowing they have specific tools they can use to help address my issue.
How do I find a coach to work with?
Ask me! Though I'm not currently coaching, I am part of several coaching networks and can provide you with referrals to coaches (formally trained or not) who can help you with all aspects of your life.
If you would like to find a credentialed coach on your own, visit the ICF website.
I encourage you to consider coaching, because I believe it can help you in almost any aspect of your life!
*If you are having suicidal thoughts, call 911 immediately. I am not a medical professional and nothing in this post constitutes medical advice and should not be used to replace the recommendations of a medical professional.
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